Life update of sorts because of how 2022 ended for me and how 2023 is starting for me :(

So, I don't know if I will post this for sure or not. 

I had a great year in 2022, even with all the ups and downs it had for me. I feel like I had more ups then downs in 2022. 

But the way that 2022 ended for me has me scared and hurt and upset and unsure how 2023 is going to go for me, because I am lost and confused right now and don't want to end up losing what I have currently, because I love where I live right now, since it is close to downtown Richmond, VA and in a good neighborhood (from what I can tell). 

I just really don't want to be homeless again in all honesty. It has happened once to me while living here in Richmond, VA and the first time it happened (at the end of January 2020) it caused me to have my first breakdown and scared one of my really good friends and caused issues with a few other friends. It almost happened a second time last year (in the middle of June 2022 and just before my birthday 6/24), but I got really lucky and found a place, before I became homeless. 

With what I'm currently dealing with it scares me, because it has taken away a big chunk of my income and with what I have coming in from where I'm working part time at Dollar Tree for $13 an hour (they don't do full time unless you are a manager of some sort and they also don't pay more then $13 unless you are a manager of some sort as well), it doesn't bring in as much as I need it to. I mean last month it brought in enough to pay my bills and rent, so that is good, but what it left me isn't enough to buy groceries (I didn't need to buy any last month), have money for gas for my moped (it is less then $5 for me to fill up, but still), put money into savings, put money into stocks, go out with friends (karoke, poker (currently costs $20 to play), etc...), go out to eat with friends once in awhile, and also be able to go on vacation if I want to get away for a bit. 

So, I'm trying to think and stay positive that things are going to end up working out and my money situation will go back to normal and get better, before the end of January 2023, because if it doesn't quite a few of my bills won't be paid and the most scary thing is that I won't have the money to pay my rent in February 2023.

I will keep you all posted with how things go, when it comes time, but for now I just kinda needed to get this out of my head some and kinda have something to look back onto in the future as well and just to see how 2023 goes for me overall. 

But for now, I'm going to jump off of here and go run an errand I have been procrastinating on for a month with my moped (getting the second oil change done on it)... to be fair I was sick for a bit, but also I've been struggling with being afraid to drive it (at least during the day and week when there is more traffic on the road)... I'm not as afraid to drive it at night because there is less traffic to deal with... but I also just have never wanted to drive either... so I think that plays a HUGE role in my struggle with driving it, but I am going to work on that this year. I am also going to work on getting my driver's license as well at some point this year.